"Hey This is hard for me because I have never done anything like this.. but I have a huge crush on you. I have never been able to tell you for reasons which you would quickly identify as obvious if you knew who this was. I'm really attracted to you and I think you would be wanting to get with *Read FULL Card Here* (BECAUSE IT'S NOT REALLY OBVIOUS THAT IT'S AN OBNOXIOUS SPAM LINK OR ANYTHING, NUH-UH TOTALLY HONEST I SWEAR)"
Why yes, I am working on my Nanowrimo, honest. ¬_¬